The Afghan and the Rosary

Greetings my Dear Royal Subjects!

Today is yet another wonderful day in the kingdom!  I finally finished the afghan that I was working on for my dear husband.  I actually used it last night when I was forced by the roaring of the dragon ( husband's snoring) to sleep in the guest room (on the couch) in order to have a decent nights sleep.  However, it did give me yet another thought on this idea of connectedness.

As I was looking at each stitch in the afghan it made me think of a rosary.  My dear mother gave me a rosary that belonged to her grandmother when I was a child.  It is a wooden rosary that looks as if it might have had every bead hand carved.  Just the memory of my mother doing something so nice and selfless was a positive connection for me, but it also made me think about god and how I am connected or not connected to him.  You see, like many others I allow my "perfectionism" to get the best of me.  I was never "taught" how to use a rosary.  I think I get the concept from watching TV and I do recall a brief discussion about it in my CCD classes as a child, but I missed many of those classes.  Then as an adult I missed many of my confirmation classes.  Hum, seems I have made a habit of missing things; things that I did not think were important then, but now they seem like lost opportunities to connect at a deeper level.

Well, back to my "perfectionism"!  I have never, ever used the rosary.  I have several actually, the one I got for my communion and one for my confirmation and a few others as well.  I kept them to give to my dear children some day, but until now I probably would not have done that either.  Why you might ask?  Well, this is easy.  I was never taught how to "do it right".  How silly some might think that statement is, especially coming from me.  But, since I don't know how to do it right and I am embarrassed that I don't know how to do it right I will not be asking anyone how to do it.  Since I don't know how to do it, how then can I pass this item on to my dear children if I cannot tell them how to do it right?  Guess what dear ones!  There is no right way to pray to god.  There is no right way to use or not use a rosary.  There is no right or wrong relationship with god. 

So, it is here that I rekindle a relationship with the creator, my mother, and my children.  I will ask my husband, my mother-in-law or the Internet how to use the rosary.  I will use it - at least once - and then I will know how to teach a least one way to my children on how to do it.  Things are so much simpler when we give ourselves permission to not be perfect and when, as a dear friend of mine Melissa Lasko says, we are not so hard on ourselves. 

Hum?  What else will I take a chance on by letting go of my desire to do it all perfect?  I guess we will find this out together as I move through my journey.

Love Your Dear Queen,
Ms. Jackie